Can someone tell me at what age a child can say if they want to go to visit there other parent? My son is 12 years old and doesn't want to visit his dad every other weekend. His dad does not do anything with him. My son asks me to not take him, but my ex has told me that he will file comtempt of court charges against me if I do not follow the parenting plan. I have told him that his son does not want to come over and he said "to bad, I pay support and I get to see him." When my son goes, he comes home with a very poor attitude. I don't know what to do anymore, please help!!!
Your first question was at what point the court will consider the childs opinion. Twelve is too young without a doubt. I have had numerous motions filed against clients where the other party has had a 13 or fourteen year old child write a declaration and submit it to the family court on the motions calendar, and it has been uniformly looked down upon. In one particular case the other parent submitted a declaration of a 14 year old and the Court stated that it simply shows they are involving the children in litigation.
On the other hand you can have a psychologist appointed or a family court services evaluator appointed and they will speak with the children. If it appears that they are afraid of their father then the psychologist or CASA/GAL (specialists appointed to look out for the best interests of the child) writes in their report that there is good reason for the child to not want to see dad then the court certainly can and will take this into consideration.
But the bottom line is that you are expected to be on the same with regard to child custody visitation and you need to encourage the relationship with the other side.
Also, paying support has nothing to do with seeing the children so you can ignore his comments to that effect.
Take a look at the king county local rules regarding child declarations:
(e) Limitations on Declarations.
(2) Children’s statements. Declarations by minors are disfavored.
I would say they are frowned on entirely. Children will usually say whatever the particular parent who is standing over them tells them to write.
Yet, again a judge at trial can take a child into chanmbers and question him/her. But i have never seen it done in any of my cases in 9 years.
Seattle Divorce and Custody Attorney, Washington Divorce Law)